United States Eventing Association

Tip of the Month

A New Kind of Bucket List

A riding instructor filled a bucket with sponges and asked her riders if it was full. They all said yes. She took a box of small stones and poured them into the bucket filling in the spaces between the sponges. She asked again. Feeling a bit silly that they'd been tricked, they all agreed that it was. She then poured sand into the bucket so that it filled all the spaces between the stones. Again she asked if the bucket was full. This time they were sure that it was definitely full. She took a bottle of water and poured it into the bucket filling the spaces between all the sand. "Now" she said, "The bucket is full."

The bucket in this story represents riding. The sponges and stones are positive things like confidence, resiliency, optimism, commitment, love of horse, and dedication that allow you to strive and succeed. The sand and water represent negative things like indecision, anger, withdrawal, frustration, and disappointment that interfere with your enjoyment and success.

If you put the sand and water of pessimism and self-criticism in your bucket first there won't be any room for the sponges and stones of belief and confidence. Instead of being disappointed after making a mistake, angry for forgetting a course, or frustrated because of a poor finish, fill your bucket with optimism by reminding yourself that success isn't measured in a single ride, class, or course. It's what you create after a lifetime of keeping it together when you might otherwise fall apart.

Become the mentally confident rider who always believes in yourself, always gets up instead of gives up and who - when you've reached the end of your rope - ties a knot and hangs on!

Here are a few ways to do it:

(1) Write a pro-list of things that mean the most to you. Be sure to include things like your family, health, goals, and the relationship with your coaches, riding mates, and horses.

(2) Write a con-list of things that have held you back in the past and then take a felt-maker and cross each one off as you think of your pro-list.

(3) Prepare an athlete-anthem like "Never gonna look back, never gonna give up" and live it every day by repeating it whenever you minds shifts from your pro-list to your con-list.

(4) Make a copy of your pro-list, along with your athlete-anthem, and post it in locations that you'll see frequently like on your tack trunk, inside your helmet, or on the rearview mirror of your truck.

In the end, always remember...

What means the most to you, says the most about you!

To sign up for equestrian sports psychologist Daniel Stewart's newsletter, visit www.stewartclinics.com