This month we’re going to begin a several-month series about defense and coping mechanisms. It’s common for these two terms to be used interchangeably, but they’re actually quite different. Coping mechanisms are mental strategies that resolve stressful events, while defense mechanisms are behaviors that attempt to avoid or hide from them.
Coping mechanisms are also called adaptive strategies because they help you adapt to challenging situations. Defense mechanisms are called ego-defenses because they function by making you avoid challenges so that you can protect a fragile ego. Unfortunately, ego-defenses distort reality, making you feel like the situation has improved but, in fact, it hasn’t. You might feel momentarily detached from it, but the underlying problem still remains.
A fragile ego can make you blame mistakes on others, repress troubling emotions (instead of sharing them with your trainer), and avoid pushing yourself outside your comfort zone. It’s also a major cause of fear of failure and perfectionism; so it goes without saying that your ego is definitely not always you amigo!
There are many different coping (good) and defense (evil) mechanisms. One of each is described for you below. In the coming months, I’ll introduce you to many more. Hopefully becoming mindful of the difference between adaptive strategies and ego defenses will help you to pick good over evil!
Humble riders have something called positive-realism. They don’t think too highly of themselves, but they don’t think too poorly of themselves either. They make the best of a bad situation without losing their confidence, trying to avoid it, or looking for scapegoats. Humility allows them to create the “just right” amount of self-importance that helps them avoid developing an over-inflated, prideful sense of self-importance that can make them want to defend their fragile ego.
Projection happens when you place uncomfortable thoughts or feelings onto someone else, or when you react to your own incorrect impulses as though they were happening to someone else. In this way, you project your own unacceptable feelings on to others; like when you dislike a judge but make yourself feel better by saying she doesn’t like you, or when you say something like, “I’m not the one who’s afraid of failure, you’re the one who’s the perfectionist!"
Riding is a tough sport requiring tough decisions made by tough athletes. Learn to be that tough rider by taking responsibility for every part of the ride (including the bad stuff) instead of projecting them onto someone else. Learn to believe that the good in you is capable of making a bad situation better!
I hope you enjoyed this month’s tip and that I’ll get the chance to teach you in one of my upcoming summer clinics. For more information on my clinics, or hosting one, please visit www.pressureproofacademy.com.
The Southern Arizona Eventing Association (SAzEA) Fall Horse Trials in Tucson, Arizona, was the host to the final USEA Area Championship of the 2024 season. The Area X Championship offered four divisions at the Training, Novice, Beginner Novice, and Starter levels. Get to know each of the horse and rider pairs who rose to the challenge in Arizona this year below!
With the end of the year just a few weeks away, the dream team of USEA Podcast Host Nicole Brown, USEA CEO Rob Burk, USEA President Lou Leslie, and Equiratings' Diarm Byrne, all got together to look back on the ups and the downs of the 2024 U.S. eventing season. This is an episode you won't want to miss as we gear up for what is to come in 2025!
The 2025 ECP Symposium, Hosted by Galway Downs is just over a month away, which means it is time to submit your registration for this must-attend educational event. On Jan. 14-16, interested attendees will converge on Temecula, California, for an important, impactful, and interactive experience focusing on honing the evaluation skills of coaches at all levels by identifying the correct, incremental steps of progression needed for each individual horse and rider combination.
The Godshall Accessibility Report, created by the United States Eventing Association’s Diversity, Equity, and Inclusion (DEI) Committee, aims to honor Christopher Godshall’s legacy by addressing accessibility challenges within the sport of eventing. Inspired by Godshall’s own struggles with mobility due to Myasthenia Gravis, the report underscores the importance of creating inclusive environments for riders, spectators, volunteers, and others involved in the sport.